Is it possible to be too passionate?

Is it possible to be too passionate? This morning after I dropped my little guy off at school I decided to come home and spend an hour just doing something for me. So I decided to lay in bed and watch TV. On Netflix I found a show called For The Bible Tells Me So which is about being gay/lesbian and how  Christians use the bible as justification for their hatred of gays (if you are one of the few Christians who do no do this kudos to you! ). After I finished the movie I started to wonder if as a counselor it is possible to be too passionate?

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By that I mean supporting and advocating for the LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgendered) community is something I feel I should do. I hope to one day work with LGBT in my counseling practice and I hope that I can be a voice of acceptance and hope for them. But I also feel this way about addictions, grief (specifically infant loss), and the overall mental health population that deals with the stigma of mental illness. There are many areas of great interest to me and many areas I feel that I should help. So as a counselor can you be too passionate? When does it become an issue? How do you narrow it down so that you can become the best in something?

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I think for me I am going to have to do some soul searching. I think part of the beauty of this profession is that we do get to work with individuals from all walks in life. I will have many opportunities to work with LGBT, those who suffer from addiction, grief and many stages of mental illness. The issue I am currently having is deciding where I feel my effort is best focused. All of these are in great need of advocates. All of them. So my journey continues and so does my passion. I am going to allow the passion to lead me where it goes. I am hoping that some of the questions I have will be answered while I am doing my upcoming internships.

Women and body image

I follow many blogs and this one I happen to follow on Facebook as well and today she posted a link to this post that I will link you to below. What this post has to say about women and body image issues is so true and might ring true for many of you.

We are good enough at Sophisticated pair just might make up stop and give pause to your own issues with your body. So read her post and pass it along!

Allie

Overwhelmed

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Yep me. It takes a lot for me to feel this way as if you ask anyone who knows me they will tell you I am always going and doing. The last 2 weeks I am just overwhelmed. I don't know if it is a combination of things or a single thing but I am overwhelmed and it is starting to interfere with my schooling, my  work as a photographer, and being a mom and wife. My energy is down, my drive is down, and my motivation is gone.

I am asking myself why. What is going on in my life? What have I been neglecting? What am I not admitting? Slowly the why is coming to me. So I have decided it is time once again to set up an appointment with a local therapist. After all I can't really counsel myself can I?

So if you see little activity it is not because I am not longer writing I am just taking a break. Sadly this is the one thing I can skip out on without feeling like a failure. Sorry! I will be back to regular writing soon.

Shortcomings....

 Oh yes you know...those things that we don't like to admit that we have....faults. Most of us go through our days totally unaware of our own faults and how they affect our lives and the people in our lives. I am no exception. I am beginning to think that a large point in going through a Masters in Counseling is to become aware, begin to work on, and change that fact...denial of our shortcomings.

So this is going to be a short post as I am pondering.....what my own faults are? How can I change them? Do I want to change them?

Quotes

I admit it I love quotes. I love how most often such smalls words placed together can really say something to me. So today I am going to post some quotes I have seen most recently that have said something to me. 

Expectation is the root of all heartache - Shakespeare

We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have : but rather comes as the result of recognizing and appreciating what we do - Keonig.

Pinterest

pinterest

I am not telling you it is going to be easy: I am telling you it is going to be worth it--unknown.

And my favorite as of lately that I fully intend to hang on my office as a counselor........

 

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Holding my thoughts

As I responded to an assignment in one of my courses I found myself holding my thoughts instead of putting them down as asked. Holding because the nature of my thoughts most likely would have offended someone within my class. This got me thinking.

Do clients withhold thoughts because of the same thing? Do our clients not feel free to speak their minds for fear of judgment by us or those around them even if we have established (or think we have) a atmosphere of acceptance? Here I was sitting within a course full of those who have proclaimed acceptance (although some more than others) and I couldn't open up and be honest for fear of being offensive or taken out of context.

 Is this the experience for clients? If so as counselors/therapists how can we work to change this or at least make our clients aware that we are aware?

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Should we push clients?

In a class of mine the subject came up this week about allowing clients time for their self admission of history and possible issues. This got me thinking. If we allow our clients to dictate the flow of counseling is this helpful or harmful? Now you might be sitting here thinking of course clients should dictate when and how they admit and discuss but stop for a moment and consider. If clients are allowed to go at their own rate without being "pushed" by the counselor would we really get anywhere? By this I mean if clients are never pushed by the counselor or made to feel a slight discomfort will the counseling process really go anywhere? Will clients see goals met? Grow? Change?

I don't advocate the choke and puke method (thanks Don B for that term over summer intensives) where clients are held in a head lock with you sticking your finger down their throat so they "puke up" their deepest darkest inner workings at every session however I do believe clients need to be pushed. They need to pushed beyond their comfort level a little more each session because this discomfort to me is what creates change and is really getting down to business. If clients want someone to continue to allow them to hold back and stay in their comfort zone they don't need a therapist for that, they need a buddy who will sit and listen and say oh man that sucks without requiring any action on their part on how to change it. Sorry but that will not be me as a counselor nor do I want it to be.

I hope to allow my clients to talk but I also hope to give my clients the skills for action. Actions that will change their lives and I am not sure I can accomplish that without pushing. Of course there needs to be a healthy balance and as counselors we have to know when to push and when to back off and allow the process to just flow that goes without saying I believe. But we have to be willing to PUSH when needed and I think that is harder for counselors to learn to do. 

Is there a place and pace for self admission? Of course there is. We must first work to establish the counseling relationship and trust between client/counselor before we begin to push the client to move out of their comfort zone but in my opinion we must push to see real and long lasting change for the client.

Thoughts?